3 SOUTHERN CHAMPIONS

TENNIS E-News

Mar. 30, 2008 Vol. VII, No. 32
South Carolina Tennis 2006 Media Award Winner
Hilton Head Island SC

4.5 Women's 60s Place Second

Claws, Imposters, Golden Girls Win STA Chmps.

COLUMBUS GA (TENNIS E-News via TennisLink) -- Four Hilton Head Island league teams went into the Southern Super Senior finals today, and three came out as champions. That's pretty much a perfect record, considering two of the local teams were playing each other in the nine-state faceoffs.

The Sea Pines Imposters, competing as South Carolina "B" team, upset the "A" team Spring Lake Cruisers 2-1 in the 3.0 Men's 70 finals. That was a turn-around from the South Carolina championships in November when the Cruisers, captained by Bob Pentz, took all three courts from the Imposters, captained by Bob Hilton. This time, Hilton and partner Bill McCaffery won at #3 to combine with #1 Dick Saunders/Murray Hallett winning to decide the match.

The 3.5 Men's 70 Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws and 3.0 Women's 70 Sun City Golden Girls captured the other two championships, giving the HHI leagues more team champions than any other locale in the competition. Add to that record a second-place finish by the 4.5 Women's 60 HHI Gals and second-in-group finish by the 3.0 Women's 60 Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers.

The Golden Bear Claws, captained by Don Ross, lost its final group match this morning, but placed first in group based on overall courts won. Frank Meade and Ernie Myers took a 6-2, 4-6, 1-0 match at #1 doubles to clinch the team championship. The Golden Girls, captained by Jean Podgorski, lost one court in three in-group team matches, then pulled out the title win on straight-setters by #2 Diane Craig/Barbara Jungk and #3 Malvina Nozick/Martha Smith.

The 4.5 HHI Gals, captained by Nanci Fitzpatrick, did what they needed to do this morning, winning a 2-1 match, but fell short of the five-team round robin championship that went to the unbeaten North Carolina Rockers. Likewise, the 3.0 CC of HH Tiebreakers, the SC "B" team captained by Carolyn Brookmeyer, won 2-1 this morning to even their record at 2-2 that was good enough for second-place finish in their group. That division was won by AR/Hot Springs Village, captained by former HHIslander Mickey Bearden, over South Carolina's "A" team in a third-set match tiebreak.

South Carolina's 4.5 Men's 60s Foster's Fighters, who included two HHI players, finished 1-3 in the two-team bracket.Though the SC guys were even 6-6 in courts won-lost, Arkansas won three of the team matches.

Here are today's results -- plus Saturday updates -- involving the Hilton Head Island area teams and players:

Saturday the 29^th

10 a.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters 3, AR/Little Rock 0

2:30 p.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters 1, AR/Little Rock 2

Sunday the 30th
8:30 a.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws 1, AR/Hot Springs Village 2

8:30 a.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Sun City Golden Girls 2, LA/Monroe 1

8:30 a.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals 2, TN/Nashville 1

10 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Spring Lake Cruisers 2, AR/Hot Springs Village 1

10 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters 3, LA/Slidell 0

10 a.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters 1, AR/Little Rock 2

11:30 a.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers 2, MS/Gulf Coast 1

FINALS

1 p.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws 2, NC/Charlotte Olde Providence 1

#1 -- Frank Meade/Ernie Myers won 6-2, 4-6, 1-0

#2 -- Ralph Braden/Jack Gamer lost 7-5, 6-3

#3 -- Paul Williams/Allan Morrison won 6-0, 6-4

1 p.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Sun City Golden Girls 2, TN/Knoxville 1

#1 -- Jean John/Frances Carek lost 6-1, 6-2

#2 -- Diane Craig/Barbara Jungk won 7-5, 6-1

#3 -- Malvina Nozick/Martha Smith won 6-2, 6-4

2 p.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters 2, Spring Lake Cruisers 1

#1 -- Dick Saunders/Murray Hallett (SP) def. Hale Mayer/Thomas Jones 6-3, 7-5

#2 -- Frank Flaumenhaft/Richard Clapp (SL) def. Hudson Fesche/Sal Zuccala 6-3, 6-0

#3 -- Bob Hilton/Bill McCaffery (SP) def. Don Coleman/Richard Bloom 6-2, 6-3

TENNIS E-News FootNote

ooooO

( ) The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of 11 is $16,400.

( ) -- Random acts and facts from the Internet

(___)

-- Dennis Malick

Unbeaten 70s

We're turning our lights off from 9 to 10 because we needed them between 8 and 9 to do this issue.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

TENNIS E-News

Mar. 29, 2008 Vol. VII, No. 31
South Carolina Tennis 2006 Media Award Winner
Hilton Head Island SC

4.5 Women's 60s in Comeback

4 HHI League 70s Teams Unbeaten Going into Finals Day at Southern Super Sr. Chmps.

COLUMBUS GA (TENNIS E-News via TennisLink) -- All four Hilton Head Island league 70s teams are unbeaten going into final rounds Sunday at the Southern Super Senior Championships. Combined, those teams have 10 team victories, while losing only two courts in 30 individual matches. Meanwhile, the HHI 4.5 Women's 60s came back with two wins today.

The 3.5 Men's 70 Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws and 3.0 Women's 70 Sun City Golden Girls will be on court at 8:30 a.m. Sunday for final group rounds that will determine teams in the afternoon group-vs.-group finals. The South Carolina "A" 3.0 Men's 70 Spring Lake Cruisers and SC "B" 70 Sea Pines Imposters are set for 10 a.m. matches and could meet in the division championship match at 1 p.m.

The 4.5 Women's 60s HHI Gals dropped a 2-1 match Friday, but come back with 3-0 and 2-1 wins today. They need a win in the morning and a loss by unbeaten North Carolina to be in the championship position. The 3.0 Women's 60s Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers won 3-0 in their first match today, but dropped a second 2-1.

South Carolina's 4.5 Men's 60s Foster's Fighters lost 2-1 in a late Friday match, with a second match scheduled for late today in Atlanta.

Here is the schedule and results involving the Hilton Head Island area teams and players:

Friday the 28th

4 p.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters 1, AR/Little Rock 2

Saturday the 29^th

8:30 a.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers 3, NC/Charlotte 0

10 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters 3, KY/Louisville 0

10 a.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws 2, AL/Huntsville 1

10 a.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Sun City Golden Girls 3, AR/Hot Springs Village 0

10 a.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals 3, AL/TUSC 1

1 p.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Spring Lake Cruisers 2, AL/Huntsville 1

1 p.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers 1, LA/Monroe 2

2:30 p.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters 3, TN/Knoxville 0

2:30 p.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws 3, LA/New Orleans Young at Heart 0

2:30 p.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals 2, MS/Jackson Parham Bridges 1

2:30 p.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters vs. AR/Little Rock

Sunday the 30th
8:30 a.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws vs. AR/Hot Springs Village

8:30 a.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Sun City Golden Girls vs. LA/Monroe

8:30 a.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals vs. TN/Nashville

10 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Spring Lake Cruisers vs. AR/Hot Springs Village

10 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters vs. LA/Slidell

11:30 a.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers vs. MS/Gulf Coast

1 p.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Final

1 p.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Final

2 p.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Final

3:30 p.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Final

Women's Pros at Amelia Island

Lindsey, Venus and More at Bausch & Lomb Championships

AMELIA ISLAND FL (TENNIS E-News) -- Lindsey Davenport won't be a top seed, but she will be a major attraction on her comeback run at the Bausch & Lomb Championships that will be played Apr. 5-13 on Amelia Island. A bevy of Top Tenners, including defending champion Tatiana Golovin, will be competing.

Venus Williams, Nadia Petrova, Anna Chakvetadze, Elena Dementieva, Dinara Safina and Patty Schnyder will lead the charge for the championship.

Qualifying rounds will be Saturday the 5^th and Sunday the 6^th, with main draw starting Monday the 7^th. Tuesday the 8^th will be USTA Member Appreciation Day with specials for USTA visitors who will include a busload of Hilton Head Island area spectators. Morning and night sessions will be played Monday through Friday. Saturday is semifinals; Sunday is finals.

For tickets and other information, go to http://www.blchamps.com.

Late May Start

Yes, And Mixed Doubles Season Is About Ready for Registration

HILTON HEAD ISLAND SC (TENNIS E-News) – Mixed doubles players, get your engines ready. It's time for pre-registration for the USTA League spring/summer season that will begin play in late May and wrap up in mid-August.

Local League Coordinator Jackie Reynecke said that pre-registration documents should be available for new and former captains by next week … and that's no April Fool.

"I would project that the deadline for (pre-registration) would be right after Heritage week," Reynecke said. "I would be looking at starting some senior teams in late May if the divisions are large."

TENNIS E-News FootNote

ooooO

( ) A woman in St. Augustine FL was arrested on Super Bowl Sunday, charged with DUI

( ) and failure to have her 1-year-old daughter seat-belted or in a car seat.

(___) However, police reported, a case of Busch beer was safely buckled up in the front seat.
-- From News of the Weird in "Funny Times"

-- Dennis Malick

Super 70s Start

TENNIS E-News

Mar. 28, 2008 Vol. VII, No. 30
South Carolina Tennis 2006 Media Award Winner
Hilton Head Island SC

4 in 70s Win All Courts

Good Start for HHI League Teams at Southern Super Senior Championships

COLUMBUS GA (TENNIS E-News via TennisLink) -- Hilton Head Island league Super 70s got off to a smashing start at the Southern Super Senior Championships today, going 12-for-12 in courts played and won. A full schedule Saturday will complete group round robin play and determine teams to advance to Sunday semifinals and finals.

Three HHI league teams that won state championships last November and a fourth that got a wild card won 3-0 today. The South Carolina "A" 3.0 Men's Spring Lake Cruisers and SC "B" Sea Pines Imposters won in separate 70s groups. The 3.0 Women's 70s Sun City Golden Girls and 3.5 Men's 70s Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws also cruised.

The 4.5 Women's 60s HHI Gals dropped a 2-1 match and the 3.0 Women's 60s Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers lost 3-0 to Hot Springs Village AR, whose captain is Mickey Bearden, former HHIslander who was co-founder with local coordinator Don Grider of the Super Seniors.

The 4.5 Men's 60s Foster's Fighters is a collection of SC players that includes HHI's Hank Iannuzzi and Keith Whitlow. They are competing in Atlanta against a select "Arkansas" team that has players from that state, Alabama, Georgia, Louisiana and Tennessee, i.e., an SC vs. Rest of Southern playoff.

Here is the schedule and results involving the Hilton Head Island area teams and players:

Friday the 28^th

8:30 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Spring Lake Cruisers 3, GA/Savannah 0

8:30 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters 3, NC/New Bern Harbour Town Hoots 0

10 a.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Sun City Golden Girls 3, NC/Seven Lakes 0

11:30 a.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers 0, AR/Hot Springs Village (Mickey Bearden) 3

1 p.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws 3, GA/Atlanta Bitsy Grant 0

2:30 p.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals 1, NC/Rockers 2

4 p.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters vs. AR/Little Rock

Saturday the 29^th

8:30 a.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers vs. NC/Charlotte

8:30 a.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters vs. TBA

10 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters vs. KY/Louisville

10 a.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws vs. AL/Huntsville

10 a.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Sun City Golden Girls vs. AR/Hot Springs Village

10 a.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals vs. AL/TUSC

1 p.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Spring Lake Cruisers vs. AL/Huntsville

1 p.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers vs. LA/Monroe

2:30 p.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters vs. TN/Knoxville

2:30 p.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws vs. LA/New Orleans Young at Heart

2:30 p.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals vs. MS/Jackson Parham Bridges

2:30 p.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters vs. TBA

Sunday the 30th
8:30 a.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws vs. AR/Hot Springs Village

8:30 a.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Sun City Golden Girls vs. LA/Monroe

8:30 a.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals vs. TN/Nashville

10 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Spring Lake Cruisers vs. AR/Hot Springs Village

10 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters vs. LA/Slidell

11:30 a.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers vs. MS/Gulf Coast

1 p.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Final

1 p.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Final

2 p.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Final

3:30 p.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Final

Men's, Women's Doubles & Mixed

Can-Am Tournament Set Next Month at Port Royal

HILTON HEAD ISLAND (TENNIS E-News) -- The 5th annual Can-Am Men's, Women's & Mixed Doubles Tournament will be held at Port Royal Racquet Club Apr. 24 and 25.
Men’s and women’s doubles will be played on Thursday the 24^th; mixed doubles will be on Friday the 25^th. Entry fee of $40 for one event or $60 for two events will include a guarantee of four pro set matches, courtside luncheon each day, player’s packages including Official Tour Gear and sponsor products, beer and wine for players and guests and a Head “Skills & Drills” clinic. A silent auction also will be held.

To enter, call Port Royal at 686-8803 or register at the racquet club.

TENNIS E-News FootNote

ooooO

( ) Church bulletin typos from the Internet:

( ) The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday.

(___) This evening there will be a hymn sing in the park. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

-- Dennis Malick

Southern Super Seniors

Dennis-

Are you losing it??? Second week in a row you got the Men's 4.0 wrong- Port Royal Sundevils and BLUFFTON SMAS tied at 4-2. Please correct- thanks.

-- Direct quote from our mail

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++

TENNIS E-News

Mar. 25, 2008 Vol. VII, No. 29
South Carolina Tennis 2006 Media Award Winner
Hilton Head Island SC

Columbus GA 60s & 70s

6 HHI League Teams Heading for Southern Super Senior Championships

HILTON HEAD ISLAND SC (TENNIS E-News) -- What started in the Fall of '07 will roll into the Southern Section Super Senior Championships this weekend as six Hilton Head Island area teams compete in Columbus GA against champions from eight other southeastern states. A couple of HHI players also will be part of a statewide team in the playoffs.

Three HHI league teams won state championships last November, all in the 70s age division -- the 3.0 Men's Spring Lake Cruisers, 3.0 Women's Sun City Golden Girls and 3.5 Men's Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws. Two area teams are going as wild cards -- 3.0 Men's 70s Sea Pines Imposters and 3.0 Women's 60s Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers.

No 4.5 divisions were played at the SC championships, so the HHI Gals are going straight to Southerns. In addition, two HHI players -- Hank Iannuzzi and Keith Whitlow -- are on the SC select Men's 4.5 Foster's Fighters.

With nine states competing, most divisions are split into two flights with a wild card making an even 10 teams. Round robin play will begin Friday and Group vs. Group finals will be Sunday afternoon. The men's and women's 4.5s are straight round robins with five total teams in the women's and three in the men's.

Familiarity breeds competition in the CCHH Tiebreakers' first match. The team will go against one from Hot Springs Village AR whose captain is Mickey Bearden, former HHIslander who was co-founder with local coordinator Don Grider of the Super Senior format in the mid-'90s that has grown into a nationwide division. Say "Hi" to Mickey, y'all.

HHI league teams, perennial seniors champions, were blanked in the 60s South Carolina Super Senior championships on Seabrook Island, but three won in the 70s. Here is the complete lineup of area teams and captains:

The 70s –

3.0 Men’s SC "A" Spring Lake Cruisers, Bob Pentz, captain, and SC "B" Sea Pines Imposters, Bob Hilton, captain

3.0 Women’s Sun City Golden Girls, Jean Podgorski, captain

3.5 Men’s Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws, Don Ross, captain

The 60s

3.0 Women's SC "B" Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers, Carolyn Brookmeyer, captain

4.5 Women's HHI Gals, Nanci Fitzpatrick, captain

4.5 Men's SC Foster's Fighters, Tom Foster, captain

Here is the schedule involving the Hilton Head Island area teams and players:

Friday the 28^th

8:30 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Spring Lake Cruisers vs. GA/Savannah

8:30 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters vs. NC/New Bern Harbour Town Hoots

8:30 a.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters vs. AR/Little Rock

10 a.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Sun City Golden Girls vs. NC/Seven Lakes

11:30 a.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers vs. AR/Hot Springs Village (Mickey Bearden)

1 p.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws vs. GA/Atlanta Bitsy Grant

2:30 p.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals vs. NC/Rockers

Saturday the 29^th

8:30 a.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers vs. NC/Charlotte

8:30 a.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters vs. NC/Wilson Over-the-Hill Gang

10 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters vs. KY/Louisville

10 a.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws vs. AL/Huntsville

10 a.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Sun City Golden Girls vs. AR/Hot Springs Village

10 a.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals vs. AL/TUSC

1 p.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Spring Lake Cruisers vs. AL/Huntsville

1 p.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers vs. LA/Monroe

2:30 p.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters vs. TN/Knoxville

2:30 p.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws vs. LA/New Orleans Young at Heart

2:30 p.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals vs. MS/Jackson Parham Bridges

2:30 p.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters vs. AR/Little Rock

Sunday the 30th
8:30 a.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Indigo Run Golden Bear Claws vs. AR/Hot Springs Village

8:30 a.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Sun City Golden Girls vs. LA/Monroe

8:30 a.m. -- 4.5W60s -- HHI Gals vs. TN/Nashville

10 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Spring Lake Cruisers vs. AR/Hot Springs Village

10 a.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Sea Pines Imposters vs. LA/Slidell

11:30 a.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Country Club of Hilton Head Tiebreakers vs. MS/Gulf Coast

1 p.m. -- 4.5M60s -- SC Foster's Fighters vs. NC/Wilson Over-the-Hill Gang

1 p.m. -- 3.5M70s -- Final

1 p.m. -- 3.0W70s -- Final

2 p.m. -- 3.0M70s -- Final

3:30 p.m. -- 3.0W60s -- Final

Early Winners on HHI

Return of and Parade of Champions To Highlight Family Circle Cup's Anniversary

CHARLESTON SC (FCC News) – The Family Circle Cup’s 35th anniversary tournament will bring back many of its champions, including the first: Rosie Casals, titlist at the inaugural Family Circle Cup in 1973 in Hilton Head Island. Chris Evert, Martina Navratilova, Conchita Martinez, Arantxa Sanchez-Vicario, Mary Pierce, Jennifer Capriati and Iva Majoli will be among those parading on semifinals day -- Saturday, Apr. 19, emceed by commentator Bud Collins.

The tournament begins with qualifying rounds Saturday and Sunday, Apr. 12 and 13 at Family Circle Tennis Center on Daniel Island. Main draw singles will begin Monday the 14^th and that's where other returning champions step in -- on court. Six of the world's Top 10 players are early entrants, including Justine Henin, Jelena Jankovic, Anna Chakvetadze, Venus Williams, Serena Williams and Marion Bartoli.

For complete information on tickets and special-events days that range from fashion shows to USTA Member Appreciation Day, go to www.familycirclecup.com. Special group and team rates are available, especially for the night matches that will be played Tuesday through Friday.

TENNIS E-News FootNote

ooooO

( ) Sign on a plumber's truck:

( ) "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

(___)

-- Dennis Malick

Winners at Litchfield

Spring Break Tennis Week Four Schedule is an attachment -- story below

TENNIS E-News

Mar. 16, 2008 Vol. VII, No. 27
South Carolina Tennis 2006 Media Award Winner
Hilton Head Island SC

Brady, Whitlow Win Singles, Iannuzzi/Young Take Doubles Championships at Litchfield

PAWLEYS ISLAND SC (TENNIS E-News) -- It's sort of the state senior clay court championships, but without the depth of draws of the official fall State Closed. The A. Foster McKissick Tennis Tournament found Keith Whitlow of Hilton Head Island and Steve Brady of Bluffton winning singles championships at the Litchfield Racquet Club. HHIslanders Hank Iannuzzi and Bryce Young won in doubles.

Brady defeated John Stone of Pinehurst NC 6-0, 6-1 to clinch his third match and losing only eight games in the Men's 50 singles round robin. In Men's 60 singles, #1 seed Whitlow defeated HHI's Joe O'Rourke 6-4, 6-2 in Saturday's semifinals and then took John Silvers of Columbia 6-2; 6-1 in the final today.

Top-seeded Iannuzzi and Young defeated Richard Ames/John Silvers of Columbia 6-1, 5-7, 6-1 for the Men's 60 championship.

In Men's 75 singles, #2 Joe Roberts of Greenville defeated topseed Bob Wiederhorn of Bluffton 6-3, 6-4. The #2-seeded Bradley Watkins of Columbia upset #1 Tom Jilly of Hilton Head Island 6-3, 6-4 in the Men's 45 final. Jilly and Brady teamed in the 45s doubles, losing in the final 6-3, 6-4 to Frederick McKay of Mount Pleasant and Greg Miller of Rock Hill.

Three other HHIslanders were semifinalists: Bob Cooke in the 45s, Frank Meade in the 75s and Lee Butler in the 80s.

"Slow" Week on Schedule for Spring Break Tennis College Teams: Only 1,000 Matches

HILTON HEAD ISLAND SC (TENNIS E-News) -- The intercollegiate Spring Break Tennis 2008 will have an "off" week but still play more than 1,000 individual matches this week on Hilton Head Island and a few other nearby court complexes. A free exhibition will be played at 5:30 p.m. Monday at South Beach Racquet Club.

It's the fourth of five weeks of the college team competition. All team matches include six singles and three doubles and are open free to spectators. Colleges represented are from the far Northeast to Minnesota and Wisconsin to Nebraska to Mississippi and throughout the mid-South.

The complete week's schedule with match sites is an attachment to this issue. Daily schedules and results appear in The Island Packet Sports Scores section.

USTA LEAGUE STANDINGS

Here is the rundown of Senior League teams in TennisLink as of the Saturday (3/15):

Senior # teams

2.5M -- 6 teams -- Country Club of HH Court Jesters lead at 6-0

2.5W -- 3 teams -- Sun City Rally Girls lead at 4-1

3.0M -- 22 teams -- Sea Pines CC Cardinals lead at 6-1 in Flight I; Shipyard Rockets are at 6-1; Country Club of HH Hustlers are at 5-0 in Flight II

3.0W -- 19 teams -- Dataw Darlins lead at 6-0 in Flight I; Beaufort Low Country Lobsters lead at 5-1 in Flight II

3.5M -- 19 teams -- Indigo Run Gold Bear Claws, Sun City Spin Doctors tied at 6-0 in Flight I; Palmetto Dunes Wannabees lead at 6-0 in Flight II

3.5W -- 24 teams -- Port Royal Glory Girls, SC Yacht Nauti-Gals tied at 8-0 in Flight I; Spring Lake Roaring Rackets lead at 7-1 in Flight II

4.0M -- 6 teams -- Port Royal leads at 6-0

4.0W -- 6 teams -- Sun City Sunsationals lead at 6-1

4.5M -- 2 teams -- TBA

TENNIS E-News FootNote

ooooO

( ) TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters on only one row of

( ) of the keyboard … unless you would prefer "proprietor".

(___) And yes … stewardesses can be typed with only the left hand.

(Typists are going to test these as well and offer more.)

-- Dennis Malick

Tennislandia

In case you wondered about some irregular Tennis E-News “deliveries” over the weekend, a brief accounting of bounced emails appears below. If you want either the Saturday or Sunday issues resent, please reply to this email.

Luck of the Irish results were in the Sunday issue only.

TENNIS E-News

Mar. 14, 2008 Vol. VII, No. 26
South Carolina Tennis 2006 Media Award Winner
Hilton Head Island SC

Gentleman's/Lady's Decision: In a tournament, when a semifinalist(s) knows he/she will be unable to make it for the final round, especially for personal reasons like travel, doc appt., golf game, etc., an appropriate action to take is: Retire at match point. That is, you are winning 6-4, 5-2 (40-love) and you walk to the net and tell your opponent you are retiring. Score: 4-6, 2-5 ret. Actually the same can be applied at any round, but is especially meaningful in the semifinals.

+++++++++ * * * * * +++++++++ * * * * * +++++++++

Southern Combo

Originality … We Like It; Cola Women Create Some Tennis "Countries" for Show

The 6.5 Combo Doubles State Champions from South Carolina were the originality winners at the Southern Sectionals in Baton Rouge LA. Seven gals from the Columbia Tennis League became the Baton Rouge Tennis Queens at the event's costume party. In costume, the SC players shown in a photo attached to this issue. We found all this on http://www.southerntennis.com. Check out their party names:

In the photo in attachment (Left to right)

Miz. 10-POINT-TIELand (Mary Ann Killen),

Miz. SERVEia (Marlene Neal),

Miz. SLICEland (Leigh Matthews),

Miz. LOBeria (Robin Simpson),

Miz Ad-INdia (Cheryl Chandler),

Miz CzechosLOVEakia (Captain, Molly Harner),

Miz TENNISuela (Nan Smith)

They won the prize for best costume, but, alas, lost on court to the eventual champion – Louisiana)

USTA LEAGUE STANDINGS

Here is the rundown of Adult League teams in TennisLink as of the Thursday (3/13):

Adult # teams

2.5M -- 1 team --

2.5W -- 5 teams -- Bluffton HS Alley Cats lead at 5-0

3.0M -- 6 teams -- Wexford Wildcats, Sun City Sun Devils tied at 5-1

3.0W -- 9 teams -- Beaufort Breeze, Palmetto Dunes Divas tied at 4-2

3.5M -- 8 teams -- Bluffton Breeze leads at 3-0

3.5W -- 18 teams -- Palmetto Dunes Dixie Chix lead at 4-0 in Flight I; Indigo Run Volley Girls lead at 4-0 in Flight II

4.0M -- 4 teams -- Port Royal Sundevils, Beaufort Rovers tied at 3-2

4.0W -- 6 teams -- Sea Pines Smashers lead at 6-0

4.5M -- 2 teams -- Beaufort Tidal Wave leads at 1-0

4.5W -- 3 teams -- South Beach leads at 1-0

5.0M -- 2 teams -- play TBA

How To Fix It If ………

"Broken" Email Services Make for a Checkered Delivery Weekend

HILTON HEAD ISLAND SC (TENNIS E-News) -- We can't explain anything about computers, the Internet and such, but the following is an accounting of bouncing and messages that TENNIS E-News experienced on the weekend. And AOL was NOT involved … to our knowledge.

Saturday

11 p.m. – TENNIS E-News Saturday issue emailed

Sunday

3:28 a.m. – Yahoo broken – message delayed – do not resend

3:29 a.m. – charter.net broken – message delayed – do not resend

3:36 a.m. – juno.com – message delayed – do not resend

4:03 a.m. -- blocked for mail-abuse -- ourclub.com

4:12 a.m. – mac.com broken – message delayed – do not resend

7:11 p.m. – rejected by bellsouth.com – blocked for abuse

8:18 p.m. – TENNIS E-News Sunday issue emailed

8:19 p.m. – blocked for abuse

10:06 p.m. – yahoo.com broken – message delayed – do not resend

10:07 p.m. – blocked for mail abuse -- ourclub.com

10:08 p.m. – charter.net broken – message delayed – do not resend

10:11 p.m. – yahoo.com broken – message delayed – do not resend

10:13 p.m. – rejected -- comcast.net – bad SMTP

10:19 p.m. – charter.net broken – message delayed – do not resend

11:12 p.m. – yahoo.com broken – message delayed – do not resend

TENNIS E-News FootNote

ooooO

( ) TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only

( ) one row of the keyboard.

(___) (And all you typists are going to test this out right now)

-- Dennis Malick

A Lucky Finish

TENNIS E-News

Mar. 09, 2008 Vol. VII, No. 25
South Carolina Tennis 2006 Media Award Winner
Hilton Head Island SC

What a GREAT day for saving DAYLIGHT time!

+++++++++ * * * * * +++++++++ * * * * * +++++++++

Doubled-Up Doubles

Luck of the Irish Gets Lucky, Finishes in Fine Fashion … and Weather at PDunes

HILTON HEAD ISLAND SC (TENNIS E-NEWS) -- The rain went away. The wind settled down. Now so can everyone else and then enjoy the St. Patrick's Day parades in Savannah and here. A kit full of three-setters highlighted today's semifinals and finals of the 25^th annual Luck of the Irish Doubles at Palmetto Dunes Tennis Center.

The finalists earned their "luck" with hard playing on court. Moss Creek Head Pro and tournament competitor Scott Christensen took his luck on the sideline, winning the top door prize donated by one of the sponsors – Adventure Radio Group -- a trip to either Gatlinburg TN or Panama City FL. Have a ball, Scott and Nancy.

Here are today's semifinal and final results. (Players are from Hilton Head Island or Hilton Head unless otherwise noted.):

Men's 3.0 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Tom Larkin - Richard Santa Maria d. Brad Brinker - David Wright 6-2; 6-2; Willis Gobeyn - Leonard Rosselli d. Bob Apfel - Daniel Lambert 6-4; 4-6; 6-1; Final -- Larkin - Santa Maria d. Gobeyn - Rosselli 6-4; 7-5

Men's 3.5 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Gary Christensen - Kevin Haeberle (Lenexa KS) d. Dave Dockum - Rick Rickenbach 6-4; 6-4; Alan Howell (Lexington) - John Tucker (Columbus OH) d. Fred Giardinello - Jerry Smith (Bethlehem PA) 6-1; 5-7; 7-5; Final -- Howell - Tucker d. Christensen - Haeberle Ret (quit)

Men's 4.0 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Tim Arr - Jim Purcell d. Mike Caboy - Tony Schinto 6-1; 6-3; David Camma - Robert Seferian d. Ralph Huff - John Joseph 6-3; 3-6; 7-6(1); Final -- Arr - Purcell d. Camma - Seferian 6-4; 6-4

Men's 4.5 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Guenther Bergmann - Bob Cooke d. Ward Krull (Tega Cay) - Jens Lamba (Tega Cay) 6-3; 6-1; Wes Breinich - Bobby Tillison d. Ken Riehm (Midlothian VA) - P.J. Scearce 7-6; 6-4; Final -- Bergmann - Cooke d. Breinich - Tillison (no score reported)

Men's 5.0 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Pat Child - Chris Mireles d.. Scott Clements - Patrick Mason 6-2; 7-6(5); Mike O'Regan - Mike Sutcliff d. Steve Brady (Bluffton) - Tom Jilly 6-4; 6-3; Final -- O'Regan - Sutcliff d. Child - Mireles 6-4; 6-3

Mixed 3.0 Doubles -- Round Robin 3 -- Julie Bigger (Sherburme NY) - Brad Brinker d. Doug Sturgess - Tina Sturgess 6-4; 6-1; Margaret Little (Cantley, Que) - Vaughn Munro d. Gordon Grant (Oakville, Ont) - Kathy Grant (Oakville, Ont) 6-4; 2-6; 12-10; Bigger - Brinker winner of round robin

Mixed 3.5 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Kevin Haeberle (Lenexa KS) - Ronda Harness (Lenexa KS) d. Wolfgang Ey - Carolyn Kraus (Bluffton) 6-2; 6-4; Christine Clark - Harold Stephens d. Julie Jilly - Timothy Ryan 4-6; 6-0; 6-2; Final -- TBA

Mixed 4.0 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Lisa Kiggans - Mike Tvrdik d. Alan Howell (Lexington) - Carolyn Sonberg 6-1; 6-4;

Allison Meade - Frank Meade d. Kathy Glynn (Glenview IL) - Terry Glynn (Peoria IL) 6-0; 6-3; Final -- Kiggans - Tvrdik d. Meade - Meade 5-7; 6-2; 6-3

Mixed 4.5 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Ward Krull (Tega Cay) - Terry Sandy (Tega Cay) d. Emily Johnson - Bobby Tillison 6-0; 6-2; Ann Lamba (Tega Cay) - Jens Lamba (Tega Cay) d. Stewart Atkins (Asheville NC) - Mimi Stevenson 6-4; 6-2; Final -- Krull - Sandy d. Lamba - Lamba 6-4; 6-1

Women's 3.0 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Carol Clark (Asheville NC) - Betsy Klein (Asheville NC) d. D'Jean Carter (Bluffton) - Sandy Tucker (Beaufort) 5-7; 6-1; 6-4; Mary Clark - Kay Kern d. Beth Fishburne - Angie Taylor 6-3; 3-6; 7-6(1); Final -- Clark - Kern d. Clark - Klein 3-6; 6-4; 6-3

Women's 3.5 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Diana Pavlick (Leicester NC) - Mimi Stevenson d. Jennifer Brown-Lozan - Sabbatino 5-7; 6-4; 6-3; Rose Andreas - Marian Trenis d. Elaine O'Brien - Kathy Ruggeri 6-3; 6-4; Final -- Andreas - Trenis d. Pavlick - Stevenson 7-6(5); 6-2

Women's 4.0 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Carolyn Sonberg - Jill Swanker d. Shannon Lurkin - Lois Miller (Bluffton) 6-3; 6-4;

Donna Bierschenk (Bluffton) - Nancy Thomas (Bluffton) d. Allison Meade - Jackie Reynecke 6-4; 6-4; Final -- Sonberg - Swanker d. Bierschenk - Thomas 6-4; 6-0

Women's 4.5 Doubles -- Semifinals -- Trish Begley - Lori Bergmann d. Maureen Bush - Janet Watanabe 6-2; 6-3; Bobbi Colket - Merrill Light d. Donna Binder - Susan Taylor 6-1; 6-0; Final - Colket - Light d. Begley - Bergmann 4-6; 6-1; 6-2

Women's 5.0 Doubles -- Round Robin 3 -- Janet Watanabe - Jolene Watanabe d. Emily Johnson - Holly Mills (Beaufort) Wd (inj); Julie Child - Ann Hunt d. Trish Begley - Bobbi Colket 6-2; 2-6; 6-4; Watanabe - Watanabe winner of round robin

In the early rounds, the tournament went to third-set super tiebreaks instead of playing out the third set.

Here are the results of Friday and Saturday matches. Sorry for the small type. Results received late morning today and too long to otherwise fit into Homeland Security guidelines:

(NOTE: Players are from Hilton Head Island or Hilton Head unless otherwise noted)

Men's 3.0 Doubles -- Quarterfinals -- Brad Brinker - David Wright d. Greg Stickles - David Weser 5-7; 6-7; 7-6(11-9)

Men's 3.5 Doubles -- Round of 16 -- Gary Christensen - Kevin Haeberle (Lenexa KS) d. Philip Manigo (Walterboro) - Mike Upchurch (Walterboro) 6-4; 6-4; Sean O'Sullivan (Bluffton) - James Stiteler (Bluffton) d. Tom Larkin - Lloyd Smith 6-2; 4-6; 7-6 (11-9); Lee Bracken - Bill Cale d. Curtis Battistelli - Timothy Ryan 3-6; 7-5; 7-6 (10-3); Dave Dockum - Rick Rickenbach d. Fred Meli - Greg Smorol 6-1; 6-3; Alan Howell (Lexington) - John Tucker (Columbus OH) d. Jack Abernathy - Robert Stockfisch 7-5; 6-2; Willis Gobeyn - Leonard Rosselli d. Justin Francis - Bob Heise 3-6; 6-4; 6-4; Fred Giardinello - Jerry Smith (Bethlehem PA) d. Wolfgang Ey - Ron Garrow 6-4; 7-6(1); Larry Solomone (Bluffton) - John Thorn (Bluffon) d. Gordon Grant (Oakville, Ont) - Jim Norton 7-6(4); 6-2; Quarterfinals -- Christensen - Haeberle d. O'Sullivan - Stiteler 6-3; 4-6; 7-6(12-10); Dockum - Rickenbach d. Bracken - Cale 6-2; 6-3; Howell - Tucker d. Gobeyn - Rosselli 6-1;6-0; Giardinello - Smith d. Solomone - Thorn 6-3; 6-3

Men's 4.0 Doubles -- Round of 16 -- Bob Holland - Fred Meli d. Sean O'Sullivan (Bluffton) - James Stiteler (Bluffton) 6-2; 4-6; (12-10); Mike Caboy - Tony Schinto d. Scott Bernsten - Chuck Zapiec 6-3; 7-5; Quarterfinals -- Caboy - Schinto d. Philip Manigo (Walterboro) - Mike Upchurch (Walterboro) 6-0; 6-7(4); 7-6 (10-6); Tim Arr - Jim Purcell d. Anthony Link - Brandon Link 6-2; 6-3; Ralph Huff - John Joseph d. Holland - Meli 6-3; 6-3; David Camma - Robert Seferian d. Kent James - Joe Panaro (Cosbob CT) 3-6; 7-5 (10-5)

Men's 4.5 Doubles -- Quarterfinals -- Ward Krull (Tega Cay) - Jens Lamba (Tega Cay) d. Scott Christensen (Bluffton) - Joe Keenan 6-2; 6-3; Ken Riehm (Midlothian VA) - P.J. Scearce d. Anthony Link - Brandon Link 6-1; 6-2; Wes Breinich - Bobby Tillison d. Bill Sanni (Doylestown PA) - Chris Sanni Wd (em)

Men's 5.0 Doubles -- Quarterfinals -- Steve Brady (Bluffton) - Tom Jilly d. Shawn Oliver - Clarke Taft 6-3; 7-5

Mixed 3.0 Doubles -- Round Robin 1 -- Doug Sturgess - Tina Sturgess d. Margaret Little (Cantley, Que) - Vaughn Munro 2-6; 6-4; 7-6 (12-10); Julie Bigger (Sherburme NY) - Brad Brinker d. Gordon Grant (Oakville, Ont) - Kathy Grant (Oakville, Ont) 6-2; 7-6(2); 7-6 (10-2); Round Robin 2 -- Grant - Grant. d. Sturgess - Sturgess 6-4; 7-6(5); Bigger - Brinker d. Little - Munro 6-4; 6-2

Mixed 3.5 Doubles -- Round of 32 -- John Tucker (Columbus OH) - Kathy Tucker (Columbus OH) d. Bob Heise - Patricia Priestley 6-4; 6-3; Fred Giardinello - Kathy Ruggeri d. Carmen Stockfisch - Robert Stockfisch 6-4; 6-4; Round of 16 -- Julie Jilly - Timothy Ryan d. Josef Fodor - Tanner Larson 5-7; 6-4; 7-6 (10-8); Wolfgang Ey - Carolyn Kraus (Bluffton) d. Bernard Chandler - Diana Pavlick (Leicester NC) 7-5; 6-3; Gary Sabbatino - Joe Sabbatino d. Tucker - Tucker 6-4; 3-6; 7-6 (10-5); Kevin Haeberle (Lenexa KS) - Ronda Harness (Lenexa KS) d. Kerri Cooke - Bruce Taylor 6-1; 6-0; Bob Apfel - Stephanie Rathan d. Emmett Diggs - Patty Diggs 6-2; 7-5; Roberta Hayes (Bluffton) - Rich Townsend d. Giardinello - Ruggeri 7-6(2); 6-1; Christine Clark - Harold Stephens d. Amy Abernathy - Jack Abernathy 6-3; 6-0; Justin Francis - Betsy McClellan d. Billie Lindsay (Beaufort) - Terry Logan (Beaufort) 6-0; 6-1; Quarterfinals -- Ey - Kraus d. Sabbatino - Sabbatino 6-3; 6-3; Haeberle - Harness d. Apfel - Rathan 2-6; 7-5; 7-6 (10-8); Jilly - Ryan d. Hayes - Townsend 6-4; 2-6; 7-6 (10-7); Clark - Stephens d. Francis - McClellan 6-3; 6-2

Mixed 4.0 Doubles -- Round of 16 -- Donna Bierschenk (Bluffton) - Art Meeder (Bluffton) d. Chuck Zapiec - Emily Zapiec 6-1; 6-1; Jim Purcell - Liz Purcell d. John Brummitt - Ann O'Brien 6-3; 2-6; 7-6 (10-6);

Kathy Glynn (Glenview IL) - Terry Glynn (Peoria IL) d. Jeannie Hall (Bluffton) - Kurt Hall (Bluffton) 6-4; 6-3; Quarterfinals -- Lisa Kiggans - Mike Tvrdik d. Bierschenk - Meeder 6-4; 6-2; Alan Howell (Lexington) - Carolyn Sonberg d. George Walter (Kennesaw GA) - Jill Walter (Kennesaw GA) 6-3; 3-6; 7-6 (10-3); Allison Meade - Frank Meade d. Purcell - Purcell 6-3; 6-3; Glynn - Glynn d. Carrie Mason - Robert Seferian 7-5; 6-7(5); 7-6 (10-6)

Mixed 4.5 Doubles -- Round of 16 -- Carolyn Oliver - Clarke Taft d. Hank Iannuzzi - Jessica Iannuzzi (New York NY) 5-7; 6-1; 7-6 (10-5); Emily Johnson - Bobby Tillison d. Joe MacDermant - Yza Shady 6-2;6-2; Quarterfinals -- Ward Krull (Tega Cay) - Terry Sandy (Tega Cay) d. Oliver - Taft 6-4; 7-6(5); Johnson - Tillison d. Kathy Glynn (Glenview IL) - Terry Glynn (Peoria IL) W/O; Stewart Atkins (Asheville NC) - Mimi Stevenson d. Nancy Christensen (Bluffton) - Scott Christensen (Bluffton) 6-4; 6-2; Ann Lamba (Tega Cay) - Jens Lamba, (Tega Cay) d. Patsy Reinsch - P.J. Scearce 6-4; 6-4

Women's 3.0 Doubles -- Quarterfinals -- D'Jean Carter (Bluffton) - Sandy Tucker (Beaufort) d. Lili Drewitz (Metter GA) - Meg Heller (GA) 6-1; 6-2; Beth Fishburne - Angie Taylor d. Paula Brasch (Marrietta GA) - Michelle Volgenau (Smyrna GA) 6-1; 6-3

Women's 3.5 Doubles -- Round of 16 -- Annabel Hammet - Carolyn Kraus (Bluffton) d. Megan Hyatt (Beaufort) - Billie Lindsay (Beaufort) 6-2; 7-5; Jennifer Brown-Lozan - Gary Sabbatino d. Alene DeLoach - Anneliza Itkor 6-3; 6-2; Ronda Harness (Lenexa KS) - Jenny Jokinen (Fairport NY) d. Mary Bowers (Bluffton) - Dianne Franks (Bluffton 6-2; 3-6; 7-6 (11-9); Diana Pavlick (Leicester NC) - Mimi Stevenson d. Christine Clark - Mary Clark 6-4; 1-6; 7-6 (10-4); Kerri Cooke - Carolyn Oliver d. Carol Clark (Asheville NC) - Betsy Klein (Asheville NC) 6-4; 6-1; Rose Andreas - Marian Trenis d. Amy Abernathy - Carmen Stockfisch 6-3; 6-0; Joyce Braude - Jan Bucheit d. Barbara Fluharty (Bluffton) - Sus Kirk (Bluffton) 6-1; 4-6; 7-6(10-6);

Elaine O'Brien - Kathy Ruggeri d. Julie Jilly - Yza Shady 6-0; 6-1; Quarterfinals -- Brown-Lozan - Sabbatino d. Hammet - Kraus 6-2; 3-6; 7-6(10-3); Pavlick - Stevenson d. Harness - Jokinen 7-6; 2-6; 7-6(10-6); O'Brien - Ruggeri d. Cooke - Oliver 6-3; 7-5; Andreas - Trenis d. Braude - Bucheit 6-4; 6-2

Women's 4.0 Doubles -- Quarterfinals -- Shannon Lurkin - Lois Miller (Bluffton) d. Carrie Mason - Sue Sturm 6-3; 5-7; 7-6 (14-12); Carolyn Sonberg - Jill Swanker d. Anne McClintock - Keiko Queen 6-4; 6-3; Donna Bierschenk (Bluffton) - Nancy Thomas (Bluffton) d. Tanner Larson - Harriet Pollitzer 6-2; 6-2; Allison Meade - Jackie Reynecke d. Sandy Harris - Lois McKinley 3-6; 6-3; 7-6(10-5)

Women's 4.5 Doubles -- Quarterfinals -- Maureen Bush - Janet Watanabe d. Nanci Fitzpatrick - Alice Hume 2-6; 6-4; 7-6(10-5); Donna Binder - Susan Taylor d. Ann Lamba (Tega Cay) - Terry Sandy (Tega Cay) 6-4; 2-6; 7-6 (10-8)

Women's 5.0 Doubles -- Round Robin 1 -- Janet Watanabe - Jolene Watanabe d. Julie Child - Ann Hunt 3-6; 6-3 (10-5); Trish Begley - Bobbi Colket d. Emily Johnson - Holly Mills (Beaufort) 6-2; 2-6; 7-6(10-8); Round Robin 2 -- Watanabe - Watanabe d. Begley - Colket 6-0; 6-3; Child - Hunt d. Johnson - Mills 7-5; 6-4

TENNIS E-News FootNote

ooooO

( ) Guns don't kill people. People kill people.

( ) Solution: Eliminate people. Where is birth control when we need it?

(___) -- Don't blame me. I'm an only child with no children. Keep those cards & emails coming.

-- Dennis Malick